Ethics

Let's think about the ethics of this for a moment:

- People who do not know they are being followed and observed, or only suspect they are, being followed and observed.

- People agreeing (for whatever reasons) to go along with people doing this to those they care about--I'm assuming due to manipulation.

- The number of lies that have to be told to pull this off.

- People placed in a situation where they are pretending to be someone who they are not.

- A person being left with people on all sides of them telling them to take different paths or give them hints to go in different directions.

- People who are being mixed up, so you don't know which clues are from you and pertain to other people out there who might be being hurt.

- People who are pretending to be the original people, so you don't even know how to contact the original people and warn them about what is going on.

- People who think they are with other people than they are, because it would be absolutely crazy to think this person is someone else, right? Someone taking advantage of that situation for their own gain. This breaks my heart.

- An entire situation where if you try to talk about any of this, people think you are joking or crazy.

- At this point, you crossed the line--I don't care about your game. I care about these people you are hurting. I care about these lies. Someone has to really know the story of what is going on and be man (or woman) up enough to realize that winning a game has never been as important to me as the people in my life being safe and sound--I can only assume that I share this view with others who might be in my situation.

- I don't care about winning. I just care that this ends, because you are hurting people. Let me write an ending for you: you stop what has happened. You bring us back the original people in our lives that you replaced without sending us on wild goose chases. You confess. You let the "good guys" win (i.e. the people who were helpless bystanders and victims) and stop messing with people's minds. My family and my friends and the other people out there who were caught in your web and manipulations don't deserve this--even if some of them have done bad things in their lives, they still don't deserve to be messed with in this way. So say you're sorry and stop it.

Let me tell you about the man I love

Digression from Lost and Found Connections blog's main topic which is, you know, Lost. And Lost-like stories--but I needed to say this somewhere.

Some people they just get wrong or they only capture a portion. People present themselves differently than the truly are inside. They bluster. They have low self-esteem. Maybe when they are being examined, they are under an unusual amount of stresses in their lives that makes them act differently than they normally would. Maybe those stresses are artificially created, for whatever reason. Some people try to manipulate other people like they are characters--but they aren't. They are people.

In theory, it really shouldn't matter if they get someone wrong, because it isn't real and the characters are all mixed up with each other anyway. But somehow this one does to me.

So, let me tell you about the man I am in love with, the man I can't imagine what I would do if I was without him. I've told the same stories over and over again about how we met, and how we started to date, but that really isn't important.

We were friends first, but yes, I was attracted to him. His hair. His crooked (more crooked then--oh the years of braces)! His smile. The way he shook so much when he really laughed. He would crack jokes, but he had a tender side. When someone became scary in my life, he was all business and very serious and tender. He told me no woman should have to take something like that. He told me that I should trust my gut. I remember I had a dream about him before we were together. It was one of the most powerful dreams I have ever had in my life. In the dream, I was in a big black abyss. There was nothing around me but darkness and I was standing a black floor, but somehow it was light. I was alone. For an unexplained reason, I was very, very sad, more sad than I have ever been. I curled up on the floor and cried. He came to me, in my dream, and he pulled me up and held me close and told me it was going to be okay. I've had other dreams with other men in my life representing my subconscious, but waking from that dream I thought--that image also represented my understanding of him. It wasn't just a part of my subconscious soothing me, it was presenting me with who I wanted with me when I was in the deepest despair. He would have done that for me. He has done that for me since then, many times, cradled me in his arms while I wept.

The first time we officially went on a date, it was like in the movies when time stops and you can't breathe and everything becomes blurry. We talked for hours about everything; we laughed; we danced; we held each other. Portions of the night are blurred out, but we don't do alcohol or drugs. It was just first love (and probably lust) hitting us with a major double whammy. Even then, I thought, well we'll just where it goes. And yet day by day we became closer and closer. We joked, grumbled, debated, laughed, discussed things. We developed in jokes.

The first time we kissed (and again and again and again, little kisses all over the face until we reached the mouth) was one of the best nights of my life. The first time we french kissed was later, when a romantic plan had gone awry. He was trying to take me out star-gazing (his idea, I told you he was secretly a romantic) and I got food poisoning. I threw up in the grass, and he stood with me and held my hair out of my face and rubbed my back and worried. After that we sat down and we french kissed. I thought that must have been the grossest thing in the world, him kissing me after I had just tossed my cookies, but it didn't matter to him, because he loved me.

I don't remember the first time we exchanged "I love yous" anymore. We knew it long before we said it.

I went away for college, and it was then that I realized how much a part of me he had become. We weren't able to see each other for awhile when I first went to the university. When we were reunited, when we hugged each other again I think we both were almost in tears. It was too long apart.

We've both been under a lot of external stress recently, and it has caused us to bicker more than we normally do--but every time I think of losing him, my heart breaks into a million pieces. When he's around, things are just better. I'm home. Fine, make me the villain, if you must, as long as it is all pretend--but if anyone wants to hurt him or my family, they need to stop. And if you are trying to make me the instrument of that hurt, you might want to reconsider your priorities.

The Lights Are Much Brighter There

"The lights are much brighter there
You can forget all your troubles
Forget all your cares, and go
Downtown -- things 'll be great when you're
Downtown -- no finer place for sure
Downtown -- everything's waiting for you."
~"Downtown," lyrics by Tony Hatch

This entry isn't a fully fleshed out blog post, just a short post that I wrote up on the Fuselage and was afraid I might lose. In Under Alien Control's "Cosmic Banditos, or How I Learned to Love the Bomb" thread on the Fuselage, fan Jane Eire suggests that Hurley sank the island.

I would like to suggest that the reason we must see the island underwater is due to an old theory--the island is Atlantis. The island is both real and a legend, and as such, it is can represent the Platonic ideal of Island. Through its connections, it can be all islands. Although often Atlantis is merely a highly beautiful, technologically advanced island, in some books Atlantis has been described as a paradise. Like the Garden of Eden, Atlantis is often portrayed as a Utopia. Atlantis famously had a series of earthquakes and sunk underwater mysteriously, perhaps due to random happenstance or perhaps as a "punishment" due to the "wickedness" of its inhabitants (again, echoes of the Garden of Eden). In many legends (and comic books, and television shows) the society of Atlantis continued to flourish under the cover of the waves.

In fact, I would like to throw out an idea that maybe the real island was underwater all along--the illusion could have been that it ever truly existed up on the surface in the course of us watching the show. We have light that scatters oddly, people who need to be drugged to leave and wake up away from the island, multiple clues surrounding water, Desmond saying that they were in a snow globe, and Ben unconcerned that anyone could get out without his help. Some who leave(?) see a version of the island that disappears without a trace, like a mirage. It's the metaphor of the iceberg. We only see the tip of the island, and there is so much underneath the surface. Or are we even fooled by thinking that we were ever even able to see the surface to begin with? Maybe we thought we were staring at an island, but it was really something else.

Of course, even in the scenario that I suggest--that the island was always undercover/underwater for as long as we have known it--one could still postulate an origin story for the island pre-submersion, and maybe part of that memory is embodied in the mythology of the show.

YOU'RE LIKE, WHAT AM I WATCHING?

NOTES I TOOK ON THE EXPOSE' COMMENTARY - 8/24/10

- The writers say that the idea for "Expose''' started the first season of Lost, that they thought about that there would be a character like Nikki.

I find that interesting that they pictured one of the characters being an actor as early as the first season, since it fits in with our thoughts about how many things on the show have a staged quality (thinking back to the costumes that "the others" wore and so many off-hand comments that seem to point to showmanship). Considering how often people turn out to be "not what they seem" on Lost or disguised (Ethan? Man in black?), it fits that at least one of the characters would be an actor or acting out a part.

Apparently at the time of the commentary, the writers said they had broken 20 episodes of Expose'. (Eddie Kitsis mentioned at Bumbershoot that the writers had broken several seasons by the end of season 5.) It sounds like a lot of fun, but I think that the sheer number, plus that they're writing them at the same time as Lost, might support my weird theory that Expose' might actually semi-parallel the Lost series or contain clues to it.

- In The Man from Tallahassee, Locke is watching Expose' in his flashback (we mentioned this in other notes as one of our few Expose' sightings)

- Mr. LaShade (name seem sort of similar to LaFleur?) wears a hat with Lando Calrissian colors.

- Lando Calrissian is one of Adam Horowitz's personal heroes, even if he is fictional.

- Edward Kitsis: "And what's funny is that at one point we wanted to do the whole show, so that this scene you're seeing right now was the last scene of the flashback, and you think you are in this really bad--you know, you think, you're like, what am I watching???? She's a stripper who solves crimes? And then at the end you realize it's a TV show, but...we realized that there was too much ground to cover, so..."

Adam Horowitz: "It just became the jumping off point for the story of Nikki and Paulo and what they were going through."

- Howard L. Zuckerman is described by the writers as a "prolific producer" and the "creator of Expose', exec. producer, showrunner, mastermind" (This guy sounds like he has his fingers in all of the pots--also "mastermind"? Zuckerman is a mad genius?)

- Sawyer provides the audience voice.

- About Nikki and Paulo "meeting" at brunch, they say that the mislead in the scene is that this is their first meeting, when actually they know each other and work together. So if we assume that this situation with Nikki and Paulo point to other characters, I'm guessing these are not the only characters who appear to meet for the first time in front of us, but actually already knew each other previously.

- EK: "I'm fooled that they're in love."
AH: "Eddie didn't read the script."

- They mention the influence of one of our favorite topics to digress about, other movies--in this case film noir. They comment how these two have the perfect plan that seems to work out, but then it goes bad.

- Apparently the matrishka doll scene is a Pulp Fiction shoutout (haven't seen it myself). They say that we don't see until the end what was truly important to the characters.

- The challenge of this episode is that all the regular characters are trying to figure out what is going on.

- They say that they purposefully cast suspicion on Sawyer as a mislead.

- Mention of the background characters as "socks" again.

- On Shannon and Boone - "great to get to write for them again" / "Shannon yelling at Boone is always fun to write." They point out that Nikki/Paulo assume that Shannon and Boone are a couple.

- "We always knew we wanted to be back at the day of the crash." (AWESOME!)

- The return of Leslie Arzt

- mention of the characters' greed overcoming them

- They mention that there were other important points that they wished they could have had Nikki/Paulo visit, but they couldn't in the allotted time.

- On flashing off of Nikki and Paulo who appear to be dead. They "seemingly broke one of our rules which was that you only flashback off of living people" / "which, still is true." I was completely unaware of this "rule" before they pointed it out in commentary, but I still can't get over Naomi apparently being dead and having a flashback. They say that they hope to raise questions "What's going on? Are they changing things now? But also leaving a little clue for astute viewers."

- They point out that Sawyer looks around to see what's buried. Character commentary -- conman, knows a thing or two about human nature, realizes "something was buried."

- Talk about bringing back Ethan

- EK & AH met at the University of Wisconsin, so the sweatshirt was a shoutout "to us, really -- a self-indulgent thing that somehow we got away with" "Go Badgers!"

- "I love that Ethan was watching."

- Re: geography matching "We couldn't have a moment between Hurley and --" "Kate, wasn't it?" "Hurley was already standing somewhere because it had been shot two years earlier." "Hurley was where he was."

- More on Pikki's motivations: "They only care about their greed"

- Love for writing Sawyer, Hurley, and Jin scenes

- Jabonees -- a word Damon Lindelof uses, they thought it would be funny

- Dr. Arzt insight: "just a science teacher" "didn't feel that special" "love that he feels that she's impressed" [with his science knowledge]

- The inhaler gag that was cut and spawned many discussions between myself and the few others who care about the inhaler on the Fuselage

- "These characters found things before everyone" / "too focused on their own petty needs" (their undoing)

- They like having Hurley find the script and talk about the Cobra. AH: "I love Hurley's enthusiasm for Expose'."

- "As always, Sawyer is so smart -- he throws them off by finding the walkie-talkie"

- They mention that Arzt makes the Animal Farm reference, and comment that Arzt believes that no one asked Kate and Jack to be leader (i.e. that's not true, someone did? Jacob?)

- Mention of another cut scene where Boone and Locke appear with shovels and everyone in the scene is hiding something (reminiscent of the idea that everyone has secrets)

- Paulo lies to her, but he does it to protect their relationship, because he feels he will lose her.

- Charlie and Sawyer feel guilty for what they did to Sun. Charlie's dilemma: "He knows what he did, and he knows that is causing a misconception in Sun and everyone else." He is forced into the difficult situation of having to confess.

- "whole world going on in this show other than the hour you see"

- They say that the quote "things don't stay buried on this island" is a mislead, because Pikki stay buried.

- EK: "I think that's the main problem with these two. They keep lying and sneaking around, you know, it's unfortunately corrupted their relationship."

- They talk about the set up for the toilet hiding scene, how the first time you watch it it is a joke, but later you find out it has a serious meaning, too. Helpful phrase used to describe watching the same thing twice with more than one meaning: "other story running concurrently."

- Talk about how this is the first time Ben shows Juliet Jack Shepard, who would become so important in her life.

- EK: "Ben's basically in control, is what you have to understand."

- Comment about how Hurley going to Desmond is basically like if Hurley has exhausted all other avenues of investigation and goes to the psychic. I didn't think about how funny this was until it was pointed out -- hilarious and true.

- "It became more and more about our characters who were there all along."

- Vincent knows that Nikki and Paulo are alive, but the rest of the people just think that he's playing.

- Charlie is trying to clear his conscience and confess before he dies.

- Graveyard -- called "Boone (Boon?) Hill"

- EK confirms that this episode was made for obsessed fans (aw, like us! Thanks guys!)

- "I like Hurley being the tough cop here."

- Discussion of her philosophy about the diamonds and how they have no value on the island / "Has she given up hope of leaving?"

- State that if Nikki/Paulo hadn't found the gum, they might have made it

- Missing Thanksgiving scene "sense of -- people who are really sad, and they're missing their lives, and starting to question what they're doing and -- that's the tragedy we were trying to go for here." (sad)

- Say that the book Sawyer is reading is Evil Under the Sun by Agatha Christie (link: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Evil_Under_the_Sun). Title-wise, another reference to a Sun! Although this quote is likely a coincidence, I like this description that Wikipedia says that reviewer Maurice Willson Disher gave to the novel: Miss Christie casts the shadow of guilt upon first one and then another with such casual ease that it is difficult for the reader not to be led by the nose. Everybody is well aware that any character most strongly indicated is not a likely criminal; yet this guiding principle is forgotten when Miss Christie persuades you that you are more discerning than you really are. Then she springs her secret like a land-mine.

- Tough Sun is awesome and doesn't let Sawyer get away with anything. (Totally agree)

- Hurley is the one who leads in Jack's absence. Hurley is "always the optimist" and "looking for good things to say even though he thinks they killed each other" for greed

- If you put together the end with what you saw in the beginning that made no sense, it comes together.

- Paulo really loves her.

- Damon Lindelof came up with the idea to bury them alive. "Don't worry.You will not be buried alive because of a spider." Phew! Promise?

- Carlton = monster = Carson = Ted Danson (aw, sweet, little gifts at the end for listening all the way through)

- The writers play a lot of competitive ping-pong, and Damon is quite good. "Write what you know" "Ping-pong, burying people alive." "That's what we do at Lost" Ahaha.

- Maybe we'll find out the makings of the Cobra.

EXPOSE' : IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN SOMETHING?

EXPOSE' RECAP/REWATCH - NOTES 8/24/10

I wrote this up for a friend that I've been emailing,
and I thought I would share it on my blog as well.

Main DVD screen - cute blue van going in CIRCLES in a LOOP that makes me want to watch Tricia Tanaka is Dead.

~

OPENING SCENE:
Girl with curly hair RUNNING - classic LOST moment - DIGGING - scared and looking over her shoulder - BURIES something that WE DON'T SEE - runs off.

The woman in this scene parallels other Lost characters. Nikki appears to be "born to run." An important theme of this episode (and Lost) is about secrets: having them, hiding them, and revealing them. "Digging" implies searching for something or uncovering it (EXPOSING it), but in this case she is doing the opposite and trying to hide something from view. We don't see the diamonds at this juncture--we don't know at this point whether she is hiding a treasure or something bad that she doesn't want other people to know about. The "what" isn't as important as the action. It's a metaphor; she is attempting to conceal something from other people around her (a secret).

~

EXPOSE' STAGE:

Now we see the same woman, wearing a ridiculous outfit--a matching white cap and trenchcoat, with a shiny bikini. She's sizzling up STAGE 3. She is announced as the "PRIDE OF ST. PAUL," and her name is given as CORVETTE. A man with long hair slicked back comes in with a CASE through the door. She notes him while pole dancing and follows him into a room where we see LaShade (from behind with his hat, so he could be anybody).

"Oh no, that's the money for the ORPHANAGE. That means, Mr. LaShade, you're the Cobra."

Mr. L: "Sorry, BABY, it was JUST BUSINESS."

(Corvette accuses him of a LONG CON).

"Pretty and smart--what a shame."

"Razzle-dazzle."

Mr. L. shoots Corvette twice--no, THREE times.

Mr. L. tells his stripper spies Autumn and Crystal that Corvette worked for the Cobra (funny--this is actually not a lie, because he is the Cobra)!

The director yells cut, and Billy Dee is nice. He offers his hand to help up "Corvette," really an actress. The gray bearded man/producer promises Nikki that "You don't need to die. We can bring you back next season." It doesn't matter to him that she was shot three times in the chest! He says that she could be wearing a BULLET PROOF VEST (or bullet proof breast--haha!). She points out she is a GUEST STAR, but promises that she isn't planning on leaving SYDNEY to head to LA. She KISSES him with HANDS on his face.

I think this scene is crucial, which is why I transcribed so much of it in detail. I have a slight obsession with all references to Expose' (the series). I think it parallels and provides clues to our show.

There's a lot to reference in this scene, so I'll just list a few details I noticed. Nikki's character name is "Corvette," which is a type of a car (numerous car references on the show, including multiple bizarre references to cars paralleling characters). She is on "stage 3." Three is a frequently recurring number on the show from the beginning, even though it isn't one of Hurley's numbers. It sounds like "Stage 3" might be a round or level of a game, although I also considered the fact that the episode Expose' is set in LOST's season three. She is referred to as "the pride of St. Paul." St. Paul is a geographical location (St. Paul, Minnesota), but Paul is also a very popular recurring name on Lost--Paulo is but one Paul in a long line of Pauls. Saints are also repeatedly referenced. Pride is interesting word choice--my first thought was "pride comes before a fall," but there's a lot of things the word could be representing. Possibly relevant due to Lost's Catholic references, "pride" is on the list of the Catholic church's seven deadly sins (lust, gluttony, greed, sloth, wrath, envy, and pride). These sins often appear in other literary and cinematic sources as well. (Also, we have mentioned before the Paul McCartney references).

She notices the slick business man with the case of money, which is reminiscent of Cooper's con. In classic LOST-style of "this could be anybody" we are introduced to LaShade from behind. The "orphanage" reference was originally one of the more surprising ones for me, but it highlights the motif of children and babies who have no parents (or are separated from their natural parents). Mr. L. calls her "baby" (repeated endearment) and his excuse for his behavior is it is "just business." Corvette accuses him of a long con and dispatches the man in the suit with her catchphrase "razzle-dazzle." ("Razzle-dazzle" is a comic book-like phrase that brings to mind magic. It also could be a possible reference to the musical CHICAGO ["Razzle-dazzle 'em!"] and/or the "razzle red" from the candies in the Jennifer Garner film 13 Going On 30). We have three referenced again when he shoots Corvette twice (pause) and then a third time. Of course shooting someone in the torso is a repeated way we see characters killed on the show.

I love that LaShade/the Cobra tells his crime-fighting strippers that Corvette worked for the Cobra, because while it's completely misleading it technically isn't a lie.

Cut. Howard Zuckerman and Nikki have a relationship. We see her kissing him passionately. Despite the age difference, we have no definite indication yet that she is conning him when she tells him she loves him and intends to stay with him in Sydney.

~

"Son of a bitch."

Back on the island, we are with familiar characters as we see "team red shirt" pwning "team blue shirt" at Ping Pong. To team red shirt's annoyance, blue shirt wants to keep playing.

"You said best out of FIVE."

"Well, now we're going best out of SEVEN."

Blue shirt is changing the number of "rounds," presumably because he wants to win. Also, possibly these numbers are indicating core characters (Five & Seven).

Nikki interrupts their game by collapsing at their feet. It's easy to misinterpret what she is saying (this clue points us to how much the writers love wordplay and auditory illusions).

Before the LOST tagline, we get: "Who the hell is Nikki?"

As noted before, the core identity of people really is one of THE questions of LOST. Who is the character and what is going on with their identity? Right now what we know about Nikki is that she was an actor who pretended to be a spy-stripper, and that she had something to hide that put her in danger. She also was in a relationship with the producer of a show she was a guest star in.

As for our "familiar" characters, they are buddies but have a friendly competition going on that has multiple rounds--six rounds already completed, but seven telegraphed.

~

We flash to Nikki and "Howie" having breakfast. Paul is serving and playing chef. We are given some insight into how Paul ingratiated himself to Howard. He kept showing up until he was given a job. It's important that Paulo is a chef, because we have multiple allusions to our characters' "true identities" being chefs or cooks, as well as people pretending to be cooks or using restaurants as fronts.

Zuckerman describes Paulo as the "Wolfgang Puck of Brazil." Not being a major fan of food shows or cooking, I had to look up Wolfgang Puck in order to get the most straightforward reference, where I learned both of his connection to LA and television and the interesting tidbit that his father was a butcher. Other possible references: Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart (pianist and child genius), wolf (the show's animal imagery), and Shakespeare/British folklore (Puck is the mischievous fey spirit popularized in A Midsummer Night's Dream).

In the flashback, Nikki's nails are painted black. Howie offers her jewelry, but not a ring, "not yet." He begins to mention something about his wife--possibly a divorce or separation--before he dies in front of them. In this scene we learn that Zuckerman was married and having an affair with Nikki.

Nikki wishes that Paulo could have figured out a way to poison him "where I didn't have to eat the same food as him." Howie has a key around his neck (paralleled with key-around-neck Jack), and Nikki rips it off his neck and goes to open the safe. Paulo wonders if anyone else knows what they do, but Nikki assures him that "everything in here is way off the books." Paulo wants to smoke, but Nikki is against it because:

1) Ashes are evidence.
2) "We poisoned him. Let's not poison ourselves."

The matrishka dolls have three layers, and inside the innermost layer is the treasure. We don't see what the secret is yet, but this scene is riddled with parallels and clues about the show, the character relationships, and their motivations.

~

Five of our familiar characters congregate around Nikki and speculate what happened. Both Sun and Charlie suspect it might have been something she ate that was bad or poisoned. Charlie, of course, draws our attention to Nikki's non-painted nails and notes that they are dirty. Ping-pong buddies argue about what they heard her say. (Both "power lines" and "plywood" might actually be jokes even if they aren't what she really said, as both wood and electricity are recurring motifs on the show.)

"Who the hell knows what she said? She was 5 seconds from dying, probably seeing the light at the end of the tunnel."

Sawyer doesn't seem to have any clue who either of them are, and while Hurley knows both their names he is uncertain of the nature of their relationship, identifying Paulo as her "husband, boyfriend, or whatever."

This scene is interesting because so much of it is hearsay. The characters appear to know almost nothing about Nikki and Paulo, but they are trying to construct a story from the few facts they have and their imaginations. They are projecting their own ideas and concerns on Nikki. This scene in conjunction with Nikki last flash underscores the idea of poison and that their food or water sources might be contaminated--a recurring suggestion on the show. The suggestion that a character is "five seconds from dying" seems to play with Jack's "five seconds" story. Of course, it's important to note that Nikki apparently isn't dead here.

~

The show flashes from Jorge Garcia's face to Zuckerman's photo in the newspaper. Zuckerman is described as an English ex-pat who also wrote Strike Team Alpha and Dr. Kincaid, Esq. His death was attributed to heart failure, not poison, so these two temporarily got away with murder.

Boone and Shannon have their cameo. Shannon accuses Boone of flirting with guys, and Nikki (wearing a flower dress) asks Paulo "Promise me we'll never end up like them." There are relationship assumptions and misunderstandings all over the place. They kiss, hands on face.

~

NIKKI AND PAULO WERE EVERYWHERE -
THE REST OF THEIR FLASHES

Starting with the crash, Nikki and Paulo are inserted into all of the key places and scenes on the island that they could fit into one episode. We learn that Nikki is greedy and her concern is for the treasure. She tells Paulo that there is "no such thing as monsters." Like Shannon, Nikki owns an orange bikini. Nikki uses her wiles on Dr. Arzt, and we find out that she slept with Zuckerman, and that Paulo is jealous of both of these guys. Paulo also trusts Ethan over the science teacher Dr. Arzt!

Paulo and Nikki find the plane and hatch before everyone else. Each one wants to investigate one of them, but they decide that both aren't safe to investigate and wouldn't help them find what they are looking for anyway. Paulo asks Nikki if they would still be together if it wasn't for the money. She dodges his question, so he lies to her when he finds the bag.

Paulo attempts to bury the secret (the lie). When Locke arrives, Paulo "hides" the matrishka doll to his side in the very same way that Hurley hides Dave's loafer in "Dave" (the loafer that may or may not have existed in the first place). Locke warns Paulo that"[t]hings don't stay buried on this island." He doesn't mean things as in actual objects; Locke is being very knowing here, a spiritual guide. He then switches gears and says that the beach is eroding (uh, why?). "Whatever it is you're hiding, be sure you pick a spot that won't wash away."

Paulo (one eye shot -- very film noir) hides the doll in the "?" toilet. We watch with him a very interesting scene with Juliet and Ben, dressed in Others rags.

Ben: "I find out what he's emotionally invested in -- and I exploit it."

Oh, Ben. For some reason, Ben wants Shephard, Ford, and Austen to come to them instead of just snatching them. He says they will get to them through Michael.

Paulo and Nikki meet on the beach. They don't seem too bad. Nikki is sad because she missed Thanksgiving.

"They're going to FIND US. You'll see." Paulo is feeling optimistic about being FOUND. Nikki doesn't understand his OPTIMISM. Paulo assures her that their misfortunes are about POINT OF VIEW.

Unfortunately, Paulo lied about not finding the bag and it falls apart for them. When Nikki confronts Sawyer for the gun the phrase, "Okay, I know you have them" sounds different to me and also like I might have heard it elsewhere in the series.

In her flashback, Nikki paralyzes Paulo. The Medusa spider slows down a heartbeat so that "even a doctor would have a hard time hearing it beat" (theme of faked death that even would fool someone with medical know-how).

Nikki says "son of a bitch"! Paulo apologizes, but Nikki says he is only sorry because he was caught. Paulo says his motivations were so that he wouldn't lose Nikki.

~

Upon a rewatch, I find this scene where Paulo is hoping to be found even more touching and rewarding, but the burying scene has always been a favorite. It's interesting to see how both of these characters parallel in such detail the other characters on the island that we have been following.

~

THE CONTINUING ADVENTURES OF CSI: ISLAND

At Paulo's body, our odd couple argue about whether he knows anything about tracking. While they're squabbling, Jin is the one who finds him. Jin speaks in Korean, and he gets a distracted answer, "Yeah, I know." (!!!!!) Hurley plays audience/detective and wonders at all the weird details in the scene (pants undone, shoe in tree). In the background, Jin unscrews a water bottle. I couldn't tell if Jin meant to drink it or meant to give it Paulo. Whichever it was, Sawyer stops Jin. His explanation is that the water could be poisoned (that's the third person who has suggested poisoned water or food in this episode)

The two guys argue over the "evidence" and start throwing out wild speculations ("a forensic hatch"). Now it's Jin's turn to stop them. "Monster." Does Jin think the monster is responsible? Is Jin warning them that their anger will draw the monster's attention or that them imagining things is dangerous because of the monster?

Hurley claims, "I'm with Jin." Hurley's interpretation of Jin's comment is that the monster is to blame for their deaths. They argue over what Eko meant when he said, "you're next."

Sawyer calls Nikki and Paulo "jambonies" (basically means "pig meat"). Hurley is sensitive about it, states that Sawyer knows their names and should treat them with respect.

In the tent, Sawyer find what appears to be poison while Charlie and Hurley stand by.(Charlie is wearing a grey shirt with a sword on it). They continue to speculate on the catatonic characters, noticing Dr. Arzt's stuff so "they must have been friends." Upon finding the script, Hurley appears to be the only one who is familiar with Expose'. Sawyer is sarcastic, and Charlie has never heard of it.

"No way. Mr. LaShade is the Cobra?"

"Is that supposed to mean something?"

"The Cobra's a big bad guy. His identity has been shrouded in mystery for four seasons."

The Cobra is a character who seems to be a villain that people don't know, but actually was working on the inside. He is a figure of mystery for the first four seasons, much like the leader behind the others. However, he was working with the good guys and hiding his villainous identity. Of course, it's worthy to note that he also was wearing Lando Calrissian colors, which suggests he might be someone who would betray them and yet actually come through later on. (We should discuss the implications of some of the reveals of what happened after season four of Expose' some time, as both the show and Edward Kitsis have mentioned plot points from later seasons).

Our con artist suggests with the walkie-talkie that Nikki and Paulo were "working with the others." Charlie and Sawyer exchange a highly significant look here, perhaps something more than just the two of them pretending to kidnap Sun.

The CSI: Island team works with the others theory, which doesn't seem to be holding up all that well due to both their location on the completely other side of the island and a lack of motive. Sawyer dismisses motive and offers a classic distraction, "Who knows why these people do anything?" He has a gun and wants to do a "perimeter sweep"--very military, cop-like. Hurley isn't in that mode and doesn't even know what a perimeter sweep is at this point in time!

Hurley goes to Desmond, who is eating an orange in Locke and/or Miles-style. Desmond is bored with the whole Nikki and Paulo situation. Desmond's "super powers" don't work like Hurley wants, but then Des says that he saw Nikki yelling at Sawyer before she died. I felt like he was being very manipulative in this scene, as if he deliberately was setting Sawyer up. Interesting that he calls Sawyer "your mate" and "your boy Sawyer"--it's slang, but Hugo seems sensitive about the word choice.

Sun defends Sawyer, says he is not a murderer and crossed the island to help Michael. There is a really sweet smile from Dominic Monaghan's character here--he appears to be pleased and amused that Sun is so adamantly defending Sawyer. It kind of reminds me of Matthew Fox's low-key, bemused smile in the background in Dharma times while Hurley and Miles are arguing about time travel.

"Sun. It was me. It was me who took you, not the others. I wasn't myself."

I love how he comes clean here and apologizes--so beautiful. The comment, "I wasn't myself" is very revealing, and it suggests that people on the island can be someone other than themselves. I expected Sun to take it out on Charlie here, but instead she went to speak with Sawyer.

They confront Sawyer, but it turns out his gun isn't even loaded. He compares it to the classic film mob scene coming for the monster -- "the villagers have got themselves some torches."

Sawyer apparently wanted the treasure/secret, but Sawyer gives up the diamonds to Sun. It's like a continuation of the Nikki and Paulo story plays out with the two of them. Sawyer gives up the treasure. It isn't as important to him as being trusted. Then Sun also gets a chance to reject the physical treasure. Sun does, although the reasons she gives are that the diamonds aren't worth anything on the island. Sun slaps him (indicating she has the the character trait of slapping people when she is angry). Is there a moment of forgiveness between these two, or only a stalemate?

Hurley gives an adorable eulogy, and then they bury them alive in a shocking, Edgar Allan Poe-esque ending.

~

All in all, Expose' is an excellent episode that really provides a lot of "easter eggs." In retrospect, I think many of these episodes that confused people initially are actually some of the best episodes in the series.

I mentioned that I thought an important theme of this episode was secrets--the biggest secret of all is one that apparently only Vincent figured out, that Nikki and Paulo were still alive. The clever thing about Expose' is that it exposes secrets in a way that those very reveals are dismissed or ignored. Its "razzle-dazzle" is burying secrets throughout the episode in such an open way that they still remain mysterious and hidden. The episode exposes the secrets of Lost by using the method of hiding the secrets in jokes, background characters, and even in plain sight.

IF I DON'T SEE YOU ON THE OTHER SIDE...

"If I don't see you on the other side, I won't blame you."
~"Follow the Leader," by Paul Zbyszewski and Elizabeth Sarnoff

The more I ponder the end of Lost, the more I believe it was a cover up. Think about the Dharma Initiative content and Room 23. Consider that so many characters have amnesia or confused memories on Lost. Watch the extra content even up to season six--"Mysteries of the Universe," Paul's search for the truth that ends in zombie Damon Lindelof & Carlton Cuse & Paul Scheer all happy with no follow through on the storyline about threats from above, and even the bizarre behavior of fans in the wake of the finale. It's actually embarrassing that we're accepting the Lost ending that we received as a straightforward ending, because it seems to me like the puzzle doesn't fit together in a cohesive way. We can make it work from a metaphorical standpoint, but all of the details say that something else is going on.

If we give up, if we accept this ending without questioning it, we're doing the very story that we love a disservice. I enjoyed "The End." I think it was brilliant writing, maybe because the Lost writers just can't help but tell a good yarn no matter how cheesy they try to be. However, I also think that the writers want us to question what happened to their original story--you know, that character driven, mysterious, sexy, weird storyline we first met. This post isn't motivated because I'm some bitter shipper who thinks seeing Evangeline Lilly and Matthew Fox snuggling up as the final romantic pairing was bizarre (although quite frankly, much as I love all of the characters, I did find that weird because there were actually only a handful of moments when I believed that the two of them had any romantic chemistry, and most of them existed in the earlier seasons of Lost or sideways in the flash-world). It also isn't motivated because I'm anti-faith. On the contrary, I have a lot of faith. I still believe in this show despite the (apparent) lack of follow through on all the clues that they have been carefully seeding into the show for years.

In the first season, the first episode we see is Pilot, Part 1, and it is followed by Pilot, Part 2. Doesn't that mean that there should be an episode called The End, Part 2? I'm not talking about the epilogue that has apparently been released, I'm talking about another ending.

Damon Lindelof states in commentary in season five:
"This--this is the other theme of the show. Take the science fiction element out of it, and I think what we're really going for here is the idea of free will, of giving our characters choices. The idea that if our character, if our characters believe they can't change the future, and, and--will they, will they even try? And I think Faraday is very convincing here, so that, for the next three years, Sawyer doesn't try--he knows, from the moment that he sees, um, Kate and Claire giving birth to Aaron, um, he doesn't try to intervene. So he, he basically buys it. It isn't until Faraday returns and basically says, "I think I might have been wrong about this--um, let's actually try to change the future in a very profound and large way by detonating a hydrogen bomb, that, that people start to sort of change their tune--but we always think it's interesting to let the characters decide, "Oh my god, if I went back to the past, and I was told I couldn't change it, would that affect my--even if it were a lie--would it affect my decision to not try anything?"

Do you understand? It is possible that we can change things. This time people can end up together that won't make us squirm in our seats or wonder what this ending has to do with the first couple of seasons. This time the villains can be redeemed. This time we can even out that good vs. bad balance so that good wins in the final round.

Also, as we saw in these last few seasons, the rules are arbitrary. Some guy made them up; another guy changes them. There's no rule that says that we can't collaborate. There's no rule that says we can't find each other and agree together what would be the best path. Are you looking for me? My life has plenty of clues, and I will share them with you if you want to share what you have discovered with me.

You can email me: maskeddevera @ gmail dot com .

KEEP LISTENING TO MY VOICE

"Keep listening to my voice. Think about what you see."
~"Maternity Leave," by Dawn Lambertson Kelly & Matt Ragghianti

Lost is full of clues that very few fans seem to want to discuss in detail (tip of my hat to KarensLostNotes, aohora, game theorists, and some of my favorite theorists over at the Fuselage--you know who you are--who prove the very welcome exception to this rule). The fact that eye color, outfits, and roles change has been mentioned in many places online, but often those of us who want to talk about this aspect of the show are trumpeted into silence by other fans. Not only are many of us told that what we see or hear is irrelevant, we're often told that we are hallucinating or imagining things that aren't even there. While apophenia is highly encouraged by the nature of Lost, it doesn't mean we should ignore the hundreds--perhaps thousands--of clues carefully placed throughout the show. As I sit and look at a screen capture of characters with eyes changing color or hear the voices of our actors change drastically, it seems to me that if we are all hallucinating, then we are all hallucinating together. Assuming we're looking and listening closely, it is only in our interpretation of that dream that we differ.

I've always been hesitant to stand behind one theory of the show and say: "This is my theory." It's just not how my brain works with this show. I have always seen possibilities and tried to keep my mind and heart open for whatever the writers had in mind for us. I've championed many theories over my time as a Lost fan as probable, interesting, creative, exciting, and attentive to details--but honestly, for me this show has so many possibilities that I feel like I'm always skating from one theory to the next. Even within one episode, I switch "theory glasses" constantly. Are we imagining into the show things that aren't even there? Is it possible that once we imagine them, some version of our theory is incorporated into the gestalt, even if it wasn't present in the story before we imagined it?

Several years ago I laughed when an online friend suggested that there should be a movie or television show made about my life. I assured them that while I'm a decent human being, I would be a boring character and my life had little dramatic potential. Yet, in the end, we are all convinced. The crux of the matter is that we are part of this show. I knew the show was in some way about the people who made it, but it took me years to realize that it was also about us. This theory wasn't my idea originally; I've heard many people on The Fuselage hint that the show is about us--but I didn't realize how integral we have become to the show until recently. We are the variables in the equations. What we imagine about the show has some power, and I would say even more so what we decide to do in our lives has power (other than the obvious fact that the choices we make in our lives affect our lives). Don't like that our characters never talk to each other? Talk to your friends and relatives. Want to know what happens? Take a good look around you. Listen and watch. Care for the people around you that you love. Practice compassion for those who you don't understand and try to put yourself in their shoes. Keep a healthy sense of humor--laugh at the absurd. Speak up for what you believe in. If you have a bad day, start over again--yesterday matters, but you have another chance to have a better day today.

As for the show, turn up the sound and listen to our characters' voices. Really listen. They change. Listen for sections of dialog that sound different--and listen for phrases that sound familiar. As a hardcore Lost fan, as the show became a part of your life, it is possible that--whether or not you were aware of it--part of your life became a part of it. All of us are the characters. I am you, and you are me, and both of us might be part of someone we have seen on our TV. We are all in this together.

"Hey David, it's dad. I'm uh...I'm in Sydney, Australia. Something...something happened..and I...I just needed to hear your voice. Um...I guess I'll try again later. I love you."
~"Lighthouse," written by Damon Lindelof and Carlton Cuse

The voice changes and blurs are everywhere. Have you heard a voice that didn't match a face? Have you heard a version of yourself?

START FROM THE BEGINNING

"Start from the beginning."
~"Live Together, Die Alone," by Damon Lindelof and Carlton Cuse

Last night I watched the movie Inception. Right now I'm not going to delve into the arguments about whether or not the whole movie was a dream, what was real and what was not, whose dream it was, who was real, who was being messed with, et cetera. (Although I do want to put in a plug for the idea that maybe the whole thing is Mol's dream, considering it was her totem and I didn't see many people suggest that idea).

I'm going to set that sort of discussion aside and discuss the idea of inception itself. (The definition of "inception" is interesting by the way. It means the beginning, the origin. It's an alpha point.)

I want to talk about the idea of planting the seed of an idea in someone else's mind. You don't need to be able to hack into people's dreams to give them ideas. Planting an idea in a person's mind, the characters point out, can usually be traced back to the original outside person who gave you that idea. It's much trickier to get someone to think or do something and have no idea that they didn't come up with it all on their own. Maybe multiple seeds have to be planted by many people...maybe a simpler form of the idea has to be planted in an unrelated context. There's a lot of psychology involved. Maybe someone even suggests an opposing idea in the anticipation that it will be rejected or "seen through." The art of "idea planting" is a type of con. There's a hook, there are staged events, there are often multiple twists, and then the mark does exactly what you planned--or else you need to have a backup plan or two.

Inception not only shows how an idea might be planted, but it also offers us various ways that a person who might be "waking up" to the idea that someone is manipulating them might be distracted:

- S/he is told that they are being manipulated, and that becomes part of the con.
- The con artists achieve buy in. They "recruit" the mark to open up doorways into hir own subconscious.
- The mark is told that it isn't about them at all when it IS (or it is all about them when it ISN'T).
- The mark is bribed by offering them things that they care the most about in the world.
- The mark is offered a choice, but it is a choice where the person offering already feels confident of the way that the mark will answer.

What do you think?

LOOP, DUDE, LOOP

Some great YouTube fan videos on the inspirational side:

From terilynn88:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lOc79G9Z3nM

From emzielouisesun:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Alk72DX-88Q

From grable42:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=un_UYbJvfxU

THEY'RE NOT WHO THEY SAY THEY ARE

"They're not who they say they are. They're pretending."
"Three Minutes," written by Edward Kitsis and Adam Horowitz

Note from Jan 24, 2010 -- That generated some fun discussion, but let's move on.

...

7/10/10 -- I added my original post back in, because "why not?":

I didn't intend to write this post so early in my blog. As I mentioned in my first two posts, I wanted to at least start out this blog discussing only the show that we have already watched on our television screen. I thought that maybe if I built a case up one step at a time, perhaps some of my later posts would be easier to accept. I have shared a few of my thoughts about point of view, as well as the way identity is treated on the show. I have partially composed another post about memory in LOST. I also want to tackle the nature of narration on LOST and the question of what is "real" before getting in too deep into what fellow fan aohora a.k.a. "Amy Monroe" might call LOST GONE TOO FAR. Then there is one of the most important elements of my journey into this kind of storytelling--the connections--which I have not discussed yet. Also, I need to do a post on secret codes.

Instead, I skipped ahead and wrote most of this post in the middle of the night. I felt that I needed to write it for myself. Have you ever noticed that sometimes events in your life that you have numbed yourself to will suddenly hit you full force at 2 AM? I couldn't sleep thinking about the enormity of what has been accomplished. Warning: this post is actually probably about a different, bigger story than the one that has to do with LOST, but LOST is definitely part of it.

"You look worried. I'd be worried, too, I was you. But you've got to stay positive, kiddo. You know, there's always that off chance that they'll believe your story. I know I sure did."
~"The Pilot, Part 2," written by J.J. Abrams and Damon Lindelof

Okay, ready? "The Others" on the show aren't the only ones who are pretending...so are the characters who we have been following from the beginning. However, that particular revelation isn't going to be the focus of this blog entry. Instead, I am going to take a step back and look at the fans of the show.

Many vocal fans of the show are plants. Those of you involved in reading and theorizing about LOST outside the show already know this fact, even if you don't know you do. You watched Paul Scheer stand up and babble about his black velvet painting starring Damon, Carlton, and a polar bear last summer at ComicCon. (I wasn't there, but I saw the YouTube video). Some people recognized right away that he was planted in the audience, but I wasn't 100% sure at the time. Maybe you winced and were embarrassed for this guy. He was so desperate and out of touch with how uncomfortable he was making the producers. Lindelof and Cuse politely smiled and nodded--looking like they would rather be anywhere else. (I imagine that they were dreaming of making a getaway on a yacht.) Were you as relieved and delighted as I was when you realized that Paul was actually there to promote a LOST alternate reality game?

Do you really think that Emerson and Garcia have had a grudge match since season one over who would play a better Hurley? (Hey, maybe they have!) I'm also going on record that the adorable Hurley lookalike fan that Garcia laughed at is also a plant of some sort. (I know why Garcia laughed, by the way--do you?)

So...who else isn't who they say they are? The short answer is that a lot of people aren't who they say they are. We shall focus our attention on the various incarnations of fans for most of this blog entry.

My father owns a jewelry store. I think I can spot a fake.
"Left Behind," written by Damon Lindelof and Elizabeth Sarnoff

FOUR DIFFERENT KINDS OF ONLINE FANS WHO ARE PLAYING PRETEND

1 -- Viral marketing moles

There are marketing moles online who are interacting with us online to get us to watch television shows and sell us the paraphernalia. I've known about them forever. Let's face it, some of them are really bad at it or only pay lip service to their so-called personas as fans. Listen--if you only show up to leave polls on message boards or try to create buzz about movies, DVDs, or other merchandise--it's pretty obvious you're a fake. It's difficult for me to begrudge these people. I assume they're just doing their jobs. Everyone needs to feed themselves or their families, pay their rent, and pay off any debt that they have. Some of them may actually be genuine fans of the shows. (Aside: Hey, viral marketing--now there's an idea! Could that be the infection on LOST?! I guess being a marketing mole is kind of like being possessed...but I digress again.)

Some of these plants get really into it, though. They have fleshed out characters, back stories, and unique personalities. I knew that they existed, but it took me longer than it should have to realize just how pervasive they are. Now, this part is the weird part--their characters appear to be paralleling the shows that they are fans of--and they seem to be leaving deliberate clues about future events in the shows. The question is, why? Before you dismiss this idea out of hand, take a moment and think of your favorite online fans that you have interacted with about your favorite shows. Have you ever found yourself thinking "what a coincidence" about how something that they say is happening in their personal lives is also happening on the show that you are discussing? Think about it.

Now, why are marketing moles' "lives" paralleling the shows? Is it because the writers were trying to include the fans in the game, and the marketing moles figured it out? Were they amused enough to join in? On the other hand, since it does seem like it is part of their mission to leave clues...maybe some of these "marketing moles" were actually planted by someone at the top of this game in an attempt to see if any of us would eventually notice how odd it is that all of our television shows not only seem to be riffing off of each other, but they also seem to be "breaching"* into real life. (I haven't told you about the breaches yet in this blog. The aforementioned fan aohora likes to call them easter eggs, but I think that they are more than that. The breaches are probably too complicated to explain in this post, but I'll make a note to try to come back to them in a later entry.)

2 -- People Creating the Show

Have you ever noticed how many of the actors, writers, and crew love to tell us that they are "also a fan of the show"? I want you to pause for a minute and think about this comment, because my guess is that it is going to become very important next year on LOST. Most of them claim that they don't visit message boards, although some of them once did. However, even if they don't visit fan sites anymore, they still might have other people reading message boards online and selecting some of the more interesting ideas about the show to share. I know that if I were writing a television show, I would be curious about what people were saying about it.

3 -- Family and Friends Recruited to Help Out

If I was posting on a message board, and I knew someone on the show personally, I probably wouldn't mention that I knew them. I wouldn't want to be mobbed by questions. Instead, I would interact and theorize like everyone else, even though I might have the advantage of having more information about the show by nature of my tight relationship with Matthew Fox. Of course, maybe I might also be recruited to leave clues about the show, in which case--I probably would spend a lot of time leaving clues for free. I mean, it's such an amazing game, who wouldn't want to be a part of it?

4 -- Famous People and Media Personalities Recruited Into the Game

There are famous fans and people involved in the show who are using their real names, but they are also leaving clues for us. They are kind of on the borderline, because while they themselves are real, many of the stories that they are telling us about their own personal lives or interactions with other people are fabricated or exaggerated for our benefit. If they weren't part of the game from the beginning, I'm guessing that they were recruited over time.

"Fantastic, give it to the guy who's not even in the game! Hey, it's taco night, dude, let's blow this pop stand. What?"
~"Dave," written by Edward Kitsis and Adam Horowitz

Did I miss anybody? I think that only leaves the last kind of fan: the non-plant. I am one of those clueless fans who just wanted to watch and discuss my favorite television shows and blundered into this game of collaborative storytelling several years ago, quite unaware of what I was getting into. I am who I say I am. However, I am also part the game now...because as I have discovered, once you are plugged in, it doesn't matter if you know what is going on or not. If they notice you, you become part of the story.

"You trust these people? They are liars! Why would you believe a word that..."
"I trust them because you told me to, Kate. When you asked me to save Sawyer's life."
~The Man from Tallahassee," written by Drew Goddard & Jeff Pinkner

All of these people pretending online and in interviews doesn't keep me up at night as much as the people who have infiltrated my real life. It was easy to ignore at first--I just pretended it was all a series of coincidences. After awhile, I knew it couldn't be that anymore, but I just kept acting like I normally act. Most of the time I even forget. I believe most people are good at heart. I have to believe that the writers have a purpose for being this intrusive. It's not comfortable, but I'm trying to just be myself.

Some days I have doubts, though. I think of how bad the budget crisis is at our school, and I worry that the students who are planted might be taking time away from other students who we could be helping instead. I think about how bad people at my job feel when these people in masks tell them about terrible things that are going on in their lives. I have to react to these confessions as if they are true--in case they are--even when I realize that it might all just be more storytelling.

I wonder if I'm supposed to be quiet and let them come to me, or if I'm supposed to turn to one of them and say, "I know. I know that you're pretending. Just tell me what all this is about. When are you going to tell me that I'm being Punk'd?" I wonder if I'm supposed to write more blog entries and expose the people who are pretending, or if I should have faith, stay silent and protect them. I don't want to choose sides in this game, but if I am forced to do so, it would be nice to know exactly what is going on in order to make an informed decision.

So there you have it. I know it sounds crazy. I have only told a select few in real life about the connections, and I have so far only told my sweetheart about the people infiltrating my real life. He is the only one who (mostly) believes me, and the others think that I am on the verge of a mental breakdown. Some days I worry that I have had a mentral break. I'm the right age for it. Then I remember my visit to Bumbershoot's LOST panel, or my fellow fans online who I can tell really want to tell me but aren't allowed to do so, or the amused glint in the eye of one of my student workers--and I think, okay, no, it's real. It's all pretend, but it's not only in my mind.

Has anyone else noticed this happening to them? Have you noticed that you fell into your favorite television show, or that your favorite television show broke out into your real life? What do you think about it?


~~~

*The use of the word "breaching" in this context came originally from Jane Eire, one of my favorite LOST fans from the Fuselage, and one of the few people to ever agree with me about any of my LOST theories. Thanks, Jane. You are an amazing storyteller. For better or worse, when you told me that we needed to trust each other, I believed in that.

WHO ARE YOU PEOPLE?

"Who are you? Who are you? Who are you people?"
~"Homecoming," written by Damon Lindelof

I have read and listened to a lot of LOST interviews and commentary by those involved in the making of LOST, and I have also discussed the show online with other fans. I think it is fair to say that, in general, what we all love about LOST--creators and fans alike--is the characters.

When I began watching the show first season, I was intrigued by all that fantastically weird stuff that was happening on the show. Inexplicably, no one comes to rescue them and Boone can't get out a cell phone signal. There's a crazy, strange sounding monster that at first we don't see at all. We have a radio tower that is broadcasting on a repeat loop a distress signal in French. Everyone we meet has survived a plane crash that Sayid points out no one should have survived at all. We see in flashbacks that Locke and Rose were both apparently miraculously healed...and everywhere we look, there is evidence that the people we are following are "not the only people on this island" ("...In Translation," Javier Grillo-Marxuarch and Leonard Dick). I was intrigued with the mysterious island from the pilot episode on, but it was when I watched "Walkabout" that I fell completely in love with the show. Locke, who should have been bound to a wheelchair, wiggled his toes. I knew from that episode on that anything was possible.

However, I don't watch LOST because the writers throw a lot of weird stuff at us. The success of The X Files had nothing to do with conspiracy theories, and Star Trek isn't about how the warp core works. It's cool, yes, but if a narrative is going to sink its teeth into you, you need to care about the characters. Several shows have a lot of weird stuff happening in them that I didn't continue to watch after the first few episodes. With LOST, I cared about the characters. I connected. I wanted to solve the mystery of the defiant expression on Yunjin Kim's face when she unbuttoned that top button more than I wanted to know what the monster was. I wanted to know if a tiger could change its stripes, if our characters with darker pasts could find redemption. I wanted to know what made the doctor get that tattoo. I wanted to know what Kate did. Watching the characters interact on my screen made me laugh, hold my breath, and even tear up. I speculated with my family and friends about who these people really were and what the writers intended for them. Did some of these characters know each other before the flight crashed? Did Sun or Jin actually understand English? With all that strange chemistry going on between them, were Shannon and Boone actually not siblings? Why did Locke seem so sure of everything?

Even in season one, our different characters had stories that paralleled each other, both on the island and in their flashbacks. In season one, the audience's lack of familiarity with the characters and LOST's outstanding ensemble cast were the writers' secret weapons. The actors sold us on all of the drastic character shifts and emotional somersaults. We believed.

As I continued to watch the show, especially upon rewatching episodes, I began to suspect that something strange was going on with identity. I couldn't quite place my finger on it, but there was ample evidence. There were those close ups on eyes. Sometimes characters would do things in perfect sync, as if they were puppets pulled on the same strings. Everyone kept asking each other "who are you?"--"who are they?"--and even, "who am I?" The same situations kept happening over and over, with different characters...

"Everyone was asleep. So, I had an idea. I'm out here looking for some psycho with Scott and Steve, right? And I'm realizing, who the hell are Scott and Steve?"
~"Raised by Another," written by Lynne E. Litt

Background characters Scott and Steve seem interchangeable to both our characters and our writers. On camera, Christian Bowman introduced himself as Steve and Dustin Watchman introduced himself as Scott. Yet after one of the two characters died--Scott, both the characters and the writers insist--it was Dustin Watchman who remained an extra on the show. The writers don't seem to care much one way or another who is playing Steve, as long as we know that it is Scott who is dead. Maybe.

Carlton Cuse: And we were struggling, we actually thought we knew who was Scott and who was Steve, but we really didn't, and in fact…then we got into a huge thing, we got the dailies back, and it was still hard to determine who was Scott and who was Steve.
Damon Lindelof: Then we gave each actor a rock, and then we said, "Whoever's left standing gets to be Scott!"
Carlton Cuse: That's right. So one of them died, but we don't know which one!
Damon Lindelof: We don't know which one. So…that's the true story.

Okay, but who cares about Scott and Steve, right? They're just an ongoing gag...or are they? Is it just me, or does the Scott vs. Steve discussion seem like it could be an important clue in the ongoing discussion about how character and identity works in the mythology of the show? Whether or not the corpse incident was intentional or just an accident that happened on set, the end result is the same. The writers repeatedly claim that LOST is about the characters, but it doesn't seem to bother them too much whether specific actors decide to leave the show or remain. In fact, it's almost like the characters are interchangeable to them.

"So, he's a doctor, right? Yeah, the ladies dig the doctors. Hell, give me a couple of band aids, a bottle of peroxide, I could run this island too."
"You're actually comparing yourself to Jack."
"The difference between us ain't that big, sweetheart. I guarantee you, if he had survived a few more weeks on this island you'd have figured that out."
~"The Moth," written by Jennifer Johnson & Paul Dini

Ever since I started reading and listening to interviews, podcasts, and commentaries about LOST I've heard the producers and actors emphasize that the important element of the story of LOST is the characters. I went searching for a few specific quotes of this sort, and Sam G. from The Fuselage helped me dig up this interview that Lorne Manly did of Carlton Cuse and Damon Lindelof from way back in September 2005: link (Thanks, Sam!)

"The genre aspects of the show are cool, and we have fun doing it,'' Mr. Cuse said. ''But I am much more engaged by the people on the show, and I think that is fundamentally what we try to do."

Apparently, Damon Lindelof agreed with Cuse, for Manly reports that Lindelof apparently chanted the word "character" as a mantra. (As an aside, I would love to know how many times Lindelof chanted the word "character.")

''Everything,'' Mr. Lindelof concluded, ''has to be in service of the people. That is the secret ingredient of the show."

If I understand this interview correctly, they are saying that not only is characterization important, but that all mythology in the show is there to help us get to know the characters. In short, in LOST, the characters are the mythology.

Now check out this video excerpt from an episode of The Write Environment, in which Damon Lindelof discusses LOST and storytelling: Damon Lindelof on The Write Environment

In this clip, Damon Lindelof doesn't seem worried when he suggests that in the next two years that Matthew Fox might choose to leave the show--Matthew Fox, who last time I checked, most people consider to be the leading man! He also tosses out the suggestion that the writers might decide to kill Kate--again, last time I checked, a character most people would consider to be the leading lady in the show. Finally, he suggests that Terry O'Quinn might want to play his character Locke differently. Was this an early hint not that Terry O'Quinn would be playing Locke differently, but that O'Quinn would be playing a different character entirely? Is it, in fact, possible that Terry O'Quinn is not the only actor who is playing multiple characters?!

I believe that any comprehensive theory of LOST needs to consider the evidence that somehow there isn't a 1:1 ratio between actors and characters on LOST. If we accept this idea, both little inconsistencies and dramatic personality changes begin to make more sense. Why do people's eyes change color? Why do our characters occasionally have the voices of other characters? Why are the same phrases repeated over and over by different people? Didn't anyone else think it was odd when Matthew Fox said "Don't tell me what I can't do" when we all knew that was supposed to be Locke's line? Doesn't anyone else find it odd when other actors say "son of a bitch"--especially when we are so used to that line being uttered from the lips of Josh Holloway? How many characters have we seen slap each other? Drink too much? Swim out to sea in exactly the same manner? Change their minds or feelings at the drop of a hat? Who are these people?

As I watch LOST, I am moved by the characters. I love watching how the interactions play out, especially when we have scenes with small intimate groups of two or three. However, do I know definitively who the characters of the show are? In my heart, I feel like I know the character, but from an intellectual standpoint, I'm not so sure. I suspect that the mystery of character is the central LOST mystery, and for that reason the writers probably saved the real meaty questions of existentialism for the final season. Either that, or they never intended to completely delve into that mystery, which is one mystery that takes most of us a lifetime to figure out. Anyway, whatever they have in store for us in season six with the characters, I'm looking forward to it!